Spring Forward, March! > Chronik ‘ner Fortpflanzung >

^ Casing genitive with the contraction ^ of an indefinite article is a cinch.
North Atlantic east- coasters are only four hours behind their oceanic correlates, having slipped an hour into the future two weeks prior to the March forward on this 25th, during which time some Euros will no doubt have dREaMs…

…of being late.

You do not lose that hour forever, though…

Stalinallee/Pettenkoferstr. 1950

Frankfurter Allee/Pettenkoferstr. 2012

…unless you’re a wage slave, in which case you get it back amidst the darkened days of holiday tedium.

Who knows what seven months’ interest on sixty minutes means to the bigass bossman.

(they get the big money for having somebody else figure all that out)

Time is money, after all, so there’s gotta be some way to short it, to profit off it coming and going, its waxing and waning.

Let’s hear it for th’ North’rn Hem’sphere!

Speakin’ o’ ‘Wich, over here in a zone yet an hour later than all that:

Philip of Remnant Hohenzollern Fame advocates swapping the much maligned Federal President with a Prussian King. There’s an English summary of that here, which is pretty lame, actually. The choicest quotes come directly from this German interview, so I’ll do the honors for those who care (with my snide remarks in red):

On whether the Office of the Federal President is adequate for the responsibilities of the position, or not:

“During the World Cup so much simple national consciousness surfaced, smug intellectuals didn’t understand their country anymore. This emotional field is one that a royal family can play on. They don’t have to come up with a policy. It touches hearts that they’re there.”

Makes me wonder why their mere existence is not enough.

On whether or not royal weddings and pregnancies are for the tabloids:

“No. Here we find ourselves in the throes of the problem that preoccupies Germany the most: our demographic time-bomb that threatens all areas of life, from the shortage of skilled-labor and domestic demand, to retirement. When, as now in Sweden, a member of the royal family is born, what joy wells throughout the land! Even the Minister President speaks of a lucky day. There is a much more intense influence on the spiritual level than from the Family Minister’s plea for better conditions for the compatibility of work and family.”

Kinda makes me forget all about my own petty problems. May our tears of royal joy drown those of common sorrow!

On how Germany might go about it:

“From an organizational standpoint, it wouldn’t be difficult. We have already had a large enough majority to amend the constitution in the Bundestag.”

On whether Germany is ripe for a king:

“I daresay I doubt it. All the same, you’re asking me the question. Nobody did that ten years ago. Maybe the clocks are gradually ticking differently.”

Funny, nobody bothered to ask me why I said what I said before I said it.

On the fact that countries like Egypt and Iran deposed their kings:

“They are suffering from this still today… …and royal houses are conceptually not fanatical.”

If this guy really believes that Iran and Egypt are suffering from having deposed their kings, all I can think to say is, ‘Off with his fucking head!’ before he turns conceptually not ignorant.
[It should be obvious that that was a joke: I would never advocate the removal of one’s head, let alone one who doesn’t even have one.]


On the fanaticism of the House of Saud:

“That’s a different situation. At least the country is stable. The royals there are predictable and they aren’t sucking their country dry.”

So if you’re conceptually not not fanatical, the sheen of stability works. Until it doesn’t. But nobody asked him that question.

On whether protestants might generally govern better:

“Christians can probably govern better because they can count of the support of the Holy Spirit.”

In case you hadn’t noticed, Prince Phil is a Protestant pastor (and conceptually stable).

UPDATE: The Pastor-Prince might be aware that the United States already has a governing family complete with joyous followers who swoon over their every quip or choice of armless dress, and sober apologists and would-be opponents who deflect the king’s every crime with the assistance of nationally loyal misdirection from the even more religious right side of the court.

Currently the American fauxleftorate is agog with tales of tyrannical birth control control. These tales are real and disturbing.

What to do to control the birth control controllers? Simple. Vote for the opposition. But what if the opposition is also tyrannical? Read that or watch this:

If polypartisan partisanship is not by design, the model sure functions as if it were. Stability indeed. So basically what Prince Philip of Prussia is proposing is the kingdom’s absolution of the illusion of not having despot kings.

And now, the above images via hover-fun.

Und ^das^, meine Damen und Herren, ist die Chronik ‘ner Fortpflanzung.
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