This ain’t No Dicking around.

Told ya you’d be hearin’ from me…

…and again well past my due date.

People don’t really listen. Not even to what they’re thinking.

Libs are all agog thinking some FOX broad put me in my place. And they think I got a lot of gall countering her with the bipartisan-ally established fact that nobody doubted the veracity of the case my folks made against the dictator we subsequently and successfully took out.

You can, quite naturally, quibble with the last bit. And I will in a second. But here’s the thing:

There’s a reason I can spew so matter-of-fecal, and it’s not just that I got a lot of gall. Do have plenty of gall. Helps with digestion after I swallow small creatures whole. But I am able to make the claims I do simply because Lib-voter types are so caught up in spiking the ball at my having been “so terribly wrong” (do ya like the way I use my hands?) they ignore who all is still lying regarding the original intelligence, like to think it makes their team look better if they are innocent sheep led to slaughtering.

It’s quite funny, really. Libs will point to the congressmen and women who didn’t give us the green light on Dear Don’s Shock & Awe as evidence that not everyone was buying in, but then they’re raring to nominate for no less than President of these great United States the most prominent one who got on board – essentially making her the strongest voice of their party. Not that she wouldn’t have been. But this takes it to slam dunk level.

Sure, Hills is the best they got from my perspective. She’s got the capital, the strongest connection to the private sector. I’d vote for her if it weren’t for whoever the Republicans will have running against her. LOL. Just kidding. I’d vote for her if I voted, but only because I know what she knew that we knew and that she went ahead with our plan anyway. Not like we didn’t know she would, or believed for a second she wouldn’t. Just like Senator- um, Secretary Kerry. And Joe.

There was a special place in my heart for those guys. Gotta new heart now. Guess there’s a special place in there, too. Hafta ask the guy who didn’t make it as long as I did. There are a lot of those.

Where was I? Oh, yeah. Reminiscing my glory days in the democracy sector. Libs complain about the money, but they keep coming back for more. My guys in Langley did a study on that kind of behavior. Turns out humans have more free-will than we had thought, just less self-control. As my pal Bibi would say: ‘Poor schmucks.’ Then he’d grill one of ’em for lunch. You gotta love that guy.

Long story short: The Hills has eyes. She and her colleagues knew what they were doing, even if they were at the time of more immediate assistance to the team she wasn’t playing for directly. United we stand. Imagine how torn I was in 2004 when John ran. He’d have been my personal preference if it’d not’ve meant I’d lose my job. In the great game, we are all Americans. Something like that anyway.

You cannot really think those guys were tricked on the one hand, and that my folks exclusively got it wrong on the other. Sure, we were lying. More or less. I’ll neither confirm, nor deny that we manufactured evidence. Suffice it to say, if we did, it was transparent to the crucial decision makers, not just those bitter few who were calling ‘bullshit’. With that in mind, if we deceived the American people, it was together and, either way, we all got it wrong. Libs desperately cling to ghostly dichotomies, especially when the DNC spooks them with yours truly. Being more than happy to remain relevant to the conversation, this Dick abides.


Look. I’m evil. Don’t mind telling you that. Wouldn’t even call it an admission; it’s simply what I am. I believe in using brute force to get what I want and I don’t believe for a second that that is wrong. And lest you think I am just some run-of-the-mill chicken-hawk, I remind you that I shot a buddy in the face.

Funny stuff. Good times.

I get that Libs don’t like me because I’m evil. But it is deliciously amusing how they can be so certain that their darlings in the Democrat Party are any less so. I will grant you that Madame Clinton can eat fewer rats than I can in, say, a nominally adjudicated amount of time. But I assure you, her blood is just as cold as mine, her deeds just as vicious, and what she earns from those deeds, just as ill-gotten.

Of course, another reason my words and deeds go further forth with impunity is that the President chose to “look forward, not back.” I mean, he could have gone after a few fish and still been able to put together a cabinet that wouldn’t have gotten caught in the net. Commissions clear tranches of folks of wrongdoing all the time, any consequent taint always fades. But he chose clean continuity. Gotta respect that.

To be clear, we do not see retina to retina on a number of issues, so it’s especially gratifying to watch Libs’ faces twitch while they are trying to reconcile their president’s having attempted to extend our brave fighting men & women’s stay in Iraq beyond my president’s deadline for withdrawal. For the Libs who have remained blissfully ignorant of that fact, there’s even more stomach-tickling glee in seeing them blush and stammer before the twitching begins. Makes me wanna pin ’em down & eat ’em. But, alas, that’s the privilege of the president. It’s an unwritten rule in the democracy game that we’re only allowed to eat our own mascots. Don’t think for a moment he doesn’t find his just as delicious.

Call a Liberal on Saturday night and he’s yucking about “knuckle draggers”  and their war-mongering “strategery” and shredding of the Constitution. That sort of thing. He’ll mock the term “rule of law” and prattle on about protecting whistleblowers. Stop back around on Sunday and he’s all about superior diplomatic procedures, viable military strategies, and being happy to have the conversation about the delicate balance between freedom and security. I’ll be damned if you won’t hear the words “rule of law” pass his lips without the slightest hint of irony.

When I said, “Rarely has a US president been so wrong about so much at the expense of so many,” with regard to the current hostilities in Iraq and our people’s reagents in ISIS, I meant that, while he may not at the time have had his seat in the Senate so as to have given my folks his stamp of approval for Operation Iraqi Liberation, his actions since acquiring the pulpit of authority indicate anything but disavowal of Iraqi Freedom, let alone can one reasonably make the case that he hasn’t signed on enthusiastically to our global war o’ terror. But ya think I’m gonna give him an attaboy? What’d be the point in that?

In simpler terms that the Libs would understand, I’m trolling the president’s fanbase. Guy’s so smooth that his Facebook followers would “like” his eating a baby (“omg i just cuted the president!!”) and then stay up all night ranting about how everyone “forgot what it was like when Shrub” was eating babies. Their duplicity doesn’t bother me in the least. On the contrary. I like it. Literally and virtually.

In the purest terms, we enable one another. I exist at the pleasure of the President. That will be true in 2017, as well, when, God willing, you will have the first woman occupy that office without having to be on her knees.

You’ll be hearin’ from me.

__

a barely unrelated Sundy Paper link: Artificial Borders Theory

Advertisements

Comments are closed.